I walk these streets like a stranger; I live these lives like a thief.

[seanan_mcguire]

Twenty years ago, I built my world around BayCon from January through May, with flashes scattered throughout the rest of the calendar. I hung my social engagements and scholastic achievements in the spaces between meetings and convention duties, and I felt privileged to do it. In many ways, this is the convention that built me.

It's not that convention anymore. Like everything else in my world, like me, BayCon has changed.

This past weekend, I was privileged to do one of the things I would never, as a teenager, have believed I would one day do: I was BayCon's Author Guest of Honor. (This makes me the only person ever to have been the convention's GoH, Toastmistress, and Chair. In different years, but still.) It's a smaller con than it used to be. They do some things radically differently, to the point that I had to step back and go "this is not your con, even though it has the same name" before I could enjoy myself. That doesn't mean they do things badly, or wrong; it was just like visiting a house where I used to live and seeing what color they had painted my room.

This past weekend, I hung out with friends. I did panels. I gave a concert. And sometimes, for a moment, when the light was right, I went back in time.

Not bad for a girl who started in the Music Department.

And speaking of music, my set list. I was accompanied by Paul Kwinn and Kristoph Klover on guitar; Beckett Gladney on harmonica; and Margaret Davis on flute and harp.

1. "This Is My Town."
2. "Phantoms of Summer."
3. "Maybe It's Crazy."
4. "Preston Miller."
5. "Dear Gina."
6. "Mama Said."
7. "Vampire Slayer Blues."
8. "Death Danced at My Party."
9. "Wicked Girls."
10. "My Story Is Not Done."

Encore: "Jack's Place."

"Preston Miller" is by Dave Carter. "Death Danced..." is by Talis Kimberley. Everything else is by me. We had a preschool dance party and sold T-shirts from a table at the back of the room, and it was an amazing end to a lovely con.

I will always miss being sixteen and thinking it was the center of the world.

Comments

[juglore.livejournal.com]

Every time I tried to get involved in something like that it died. I have trouble disbelieving that I kill fun.

I am glad that you could go down memory lane.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Me, too.

[wfw-sj.livejournal.com]

Good seeing you, good lady.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Yes!

[kshandra]

"this is not your con, even though it has the same name"

I think a lot of us are still learning that lesson.

[melchar.livejournal.com]

Sad truth. I just fell out of going to it, the last few years. ... but years ago, it was splendid [and I remember Seanan from when I was wrangling gofers ^_^]

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

It's a hard one.

[saare-snowqueen.livejournal.com]

That which doesn't change, dies. As true of Cons as people.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Truth.

[scifantasy.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, I'd love to hear your take on "Preston Miller."

It sounds like a truly wonderful time.

[vixyish.livejournal.com]

...wait, you haven't heard that? We've been covering it for YEARS.

[scifantasy.livejournal.com]

Not by your crew(s). Unless you did it at LonCon and my memory is misfiring...

I know the song from the CD, of course.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Remind me of that the next time we're doing a concert at a con near you.

[sdelmonte]

Nice to know that even if the con that was home has changed, it's still the con that was home. Can't say that at all about my first gencon (though I was 30 and not 16, so that makes a big difference).

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

*nodnod*

[nelc.livejournal.com]

> In different years, but still.

Oh, I don't think you want to be all those things in the same year. That would be exhausting, I'm sure. (But might be funny to watch.)

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Michael keeps threatening to have a year where I'm the only guest, and I'm all of them.

[gothrockrulz.livejournal.com]

Wow, that must have been some experience! Glad you had a good time, even if there were moments that threw you for a loop. Congratulations on being the Author Guest of Honor. :)

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[vettecat.livejournal.com]

Wow, that's quite a trajectory. I wonder if it's unique to you.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

I think it is.

[rono-60103.livejournal.com]

Did 16-year-old Seanan expect to be a Fan GoH at a Westercon either?

I'm glad you had fun. I enjoyed the concert (as usual)

The con that was my home for many years (the one I did a lot of work for over those years), before I moved from the Chicago area to San Diego, ceased being the con I worked on shortly after I moved - for a lot of less than optimal reasons - and potentially has ceased altogether. So, I can sympthize with your feelings.

I look forward to seeing you at Westercon.

[seanan-mcguire.livejournal.com]

That seemed less unrealistic, to be honest. I knew I was good at being a fan.