seanan_mcguire (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
seanan_mcguire) wrote2009-11-20 10:56 pm
seanan_mcguire) wrote2009-11-20 10:56 pm
Entry tags:
Serial killer fun!
There was a contest on Twitter earlier this week, wherein those of us who had nothing better to do with our time tried to compose complete, if very short, stories involving serial killers in order to win a book about a serial killer. I don't think I won, but wow did I have a lovely time, and as exercises in brevity go, this one was awesome. I give you...serial killer party!
"Corn mazes are full of shadows and, at Halloween, full of screams. She moves amongst artificial monsters, natural and sharp."
"Some like the personal touch: razors, throats, the copper taste of blood. Others think larger. Don't drink the water."
"They always blame the men with the axes, not the little girls who inexplicably survive. Beware the ones in the red hoods."
"Every time Jean Grey dies, I kill a redhead and set the body on fire. They just killed Emma Frost. Time for the freezer."
"Tapeworm eggs easily survive the blender. My friends love my protein shakes, and they all die thin and oh-so-pretty."
"Horror movie extras often go missing. Everyone thinks they're lazy or drunk. No one notices the blood on the caterer's hands."
"Who stalked who was open to debate. One had a razor; the other a roll of duct tape. It was either love or killing time."
"Murder is like Chinese food. An hour later you're hungry again. Waitresses in Chinese restaurants often walk home alone."
I am sometimes way, way too easily amused, I swear.
"Corn mazes are full of shadows and, at Halloween, full of screams. She moves amongst artificial monsters, natural and sharp."
"Some like the personal touch: razors, throats, the copper taste of blood. Others think larger. Don't drink the water."
"They always blame the men with the axes, not the little girls who inexplicably survive. Beware the ones in the red hoods."
"Every time Jean Grey dies, I kill a redhead and set the body on fire. They just killed Emma Frost. Time for the freezer."
"Tapeworm eggs easily survive the blender. My friends love my protein shakes, and they all die thin and oh-so-pretty."
"Horror movie extras often go missing. Everyone thinks they're lazy or drunk. No one notices the blood on the caterer's hands."
"Who stalked who was open to debate. One had a razor; the other a roll of duct tape. It was either love or killing time."
"Murder is like Chinese food. An hour later you're hungry again. Waitresses in Chinese restaurants often walk home alone."
I am sometimes way, way too easily amused, I swear.
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In other words: Very well done.
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