seanan_mcguire (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
seanan_mcguire) wrote2008-12-15 10:36 am
seanan_mcguire) wrote2008-12-15 10:36 am
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My mother reviews 'The Stepsister Scheme.'
I went holiday shopping with my mother yesterday. Always an entertaining experience, since she's essentially tireless, shameless, and the only person I know willing to go through the entire bottom-of-the-barrel clearance section at Rasputin's with me. As we were driving to the mall, the following exchange took place. (I started transcribing as we talked, and I take good shorthand, so this really is close to verbatim.)
Mom: "I finished that book you gave me. I really liked it."
Me: "You mean The Stepsister Scheme?"
Mom: "Yeah."
Me: "Good! Did you bring it back?"
Mom: "No, I forgot. I just can't believe a guy wrote it. Is he a little light in the loafers maybe?"
(We pause while I giggle hysterically. Then:)
Me: "No, Jim's married. He has kids."
Mom: "Oh. Well, it was really good. He describes things really well."
Me: "Well, I'll tell him."
Mom: "You tell him your mother gives it a thumbs up. Now he just has to write another one."
Me: "He has. It's called The Mermaid's Madness. It'll probably be out next year."
Mom: "Good! Because I want to know--"
(There is a longer pause while my mother gives opinions on the book that would count as spoilers if they were posted here. Also, because I spent half of her diatribe laughing too hard to write.)
Me: "I'll let him know."
Mom: "I couldn't put it down. It's one of those books you can't put down. I got home at three in the morning and I was reading the damn thing. I was like you in your bed with the flashlight when you were a kid."
Me: "That's awesome."
Mom: "I really liked how he handled--"
(Another long pause while Mom goes on about the book. Also, more laughter.)
Mom: "So I figure people will like it."
Me: "Good."
Mom: "On second thought, maybe you shouldn't tell him I read his book if it's not out yet."
Me: "That's what ARCs are for. They help build word of mouth, and that sells more copies."
Mom: "Oh. Well, I'll tell everybody they should buy it."
There you have it. The Stepsister Scheme: it kept my crazy mother up all night. (Also, she would pause for the rest of the day, say 'Cinderwench,' and just start giggling.)
Mom: "I finished that book you gave me. I really liked it."
Me: "You mean The Stepsister Scheme?"
Mom: "Yeah."
Me: "Good! Did you bring it back?"
Mom: "No, I forgot. I just can't believe a guy wrote it. Is he a little light in the loafers maybe?"
(We pause while I giggle hysterically. Then:)
Me: "No, Jim's married. He has kids."
Mom: "Oh. Well, it was really good. He describes things really well."
Me: "Well, I'll tell him."
Mom: "You tell him your mother gives it a thumbs up. Now he just has to write another one."
Me: "He has. It's called The Mermaid's Madness. It'll probably be out next year."
Mom: "Good! Because I want to know--"
(There is a longer pause while my mother gives opinions on the book that would count as spoilers if they were posted here. Also, because I spent half of her diatribe laughing too hard to write.)
Me: "I'll let him know."
Mom: "I couldn't put it down. It's one of those books you can't put down. I got home at three in the morning and I was reading the damn thing. I was like you in your bed with the flashlight when you were a kid."
Me: "That's awesome."
Mom: "I really liked how he handled--"
(Another long pause while Mom goes on about the book. Also, more laughter.)
Mom: "So I figure people will like it."
Me: "Good."
Mom: "On second thought, maybe you shouldn't tell him I read his book if it's not out yet."
Me: "That's what ARCs are for. They help build word of mouth, and that sells more copies."
Mom: "Oh. Well, I'll tell everybody they should buy it."
There you have it. The Stepsister Scheme: it kept my crazy mother up all night. (Also, she would pause for the rest of the day, say 'Cinderwench,' and just start giggling.)
no subject
My mother's nuts. Shortly after this, she had a good rant about potato bugs (created by Satan) and the publishing industry (staffed by angels who appreciate her baby's [my] genius, and run by devils who won't let me give her a publication date). And then we went to Mervyn's. A week before Christmas.
Anyway, hi!